Quietly Hope

Quietly Hope. By Tori VanderPloeg
I have experienced many different seasons in my prayer life. I've had seasons of bold prayers spoken out loud. Seasons of being a warrior. I have had seasons of quietly talking to the Lord all day about everything on my mind. Seasons of being a friend. I've had seasons where my prayers are a constant stream of questions to the Lord. Seasons of doubt. But the season of prayer I experienced after the loss of my husband's job in 2018 was the most transforming season I have ever experienced. It was a season of quietly hoping. Much of it was shaped by Lamentations 3:19-36. I love the way these verses are conveyed in The Message translation of the Bible. I know it's a lot but stick with me...

It's a Good Thing to Hope for Help From God
 I’ll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness,    the taste of ashes, the poison I’ve swallowed. I remember it all—oh, how well I remember—    the feeling of hitting the bottom. But there’s one other thing I remember    and remember, I keep a grip on hope: God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out,    his merciful love couldn’t have dried up. They’re created new every morning.    How great your faithfulness! I’m sticking with God (I say it over and over).    He’s all I’ve got left. God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits,    to the woman who diligently seeks. It’s a good thing to quietly hope,    quietly hope for help from God. It’s a good thing when you’re young    to stick it out through the hard times. When life is heavy and hard to take,    go off by yourself. Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions:    Wait for hope to appear. Don’t run from trouble. Take it full-face.    The “worst” is never the worst. Why? Because the Master won’t ever    walkout and fail to return. If he works severely, he also works tenderly.    His stockpiles of loyal love are immense. He takes no pleasure in making life hard,    in throwing roadblocks in the way:  Stomping down hard    on luckless prisoners, Refusing justice to victims    in the court of High God, Tampering with evidence—    the Master does not approve of such things.

I was six months pregnant with our first kid, getting ready to head to midweek service when Alex called. He was swinging by the office and then headed home. Only three days before he had looked at me and told me how happy he was. His job was a dream, a baby boy on the way, and our marriage settling into the sweetest season. We were so happy. Less than an hour after Alex's first call I picked up my phone to hear the scariest words I had ever heard. "I just lost my job".

" Oh, how well I remember- the feeling of hitting the bottom." I can still feel the heaviness that fell on my chest with those few words. I fell to the ground and  I wept. Then, out of no where, I remembered a scripture I had read only days before, "God's loyal love couldn't have run out. His merciful love couldn't have dried up." God is still good. Even in this. I decided quickly, "I'm sticking with God"

The next morning I took the wise advice from this section of scripture. I went off by myself, entered in silence, didn't ask questions, and I waited for hope to appear. As I curled up on my cozy gray chaise and faced the window, I spoke one thing allowed to God. "Thank you for being good." Then I sat in silence.

For over three months I started every morning like this. I  would sit in my chair without saying a word or thinking a word. Day after day. I waited for hope to appear. After a while the worst situation I had faced yet became smaller and smaller. My faith grew deeper. I no longer felt caught up in anxiety and riddled with worry. And my time with God took up hours of my day.

I began to thank God for more time with Alex before the baby came. I didn't ask why it had happened. I would thank God for each small job that came our way. I didn't blame him for no stable income. I would thank God for the baby inside of me. I didn't list off worries I had about the timing. I thanked God for the job he had lined up for Alex. I believed that God had already brought the victory. I didn't run from the trouble we were facing or problem solve it for myself. God had not walked out on us.  My prayers were that of quiet hope.

I had never before experienced such closeness to God. I'd also never before made it so simple on myself. Just go to God and be.

Sometimes we think of what our prayer life should be and it can get so complicated. I should be saying this or doing that. We assume that only lengthy eloquent prayers can get the attention of God. Sometimes, we only find ourselves reaching out when we have a need. Or, God only seems worthy of our praise when everything is going perfectly. We can run ourselves ragged trying to meet expectations that were never once required for us to enter into His presence.

This section of scripture paints a beautiful picture of what our prayer life should look like. Someone knowing their pain and struggle. Knowing their need and yet so meekly tucking away to be with God. It says that he " proves to be good to the man who passionately waits, to the woman who diligently seeks". Life will in fact be heavy and at times so hard to take. We will have times where we remember well the feeling of hitting the bottom. But in the midst of all of it- are we anchored in the hope of Christ?  Because that hope is all you need to get through anything. 

God's love is immense. His hope is a lifeline. Whatever you are facing today have you tucked away and waited on God? Have you thanked Him for his goodness and then sought out hope? He is good to the man who does.
When life is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself. Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions: Wait for hope to appear
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3 Comments


Pastor Brian - June 30th, 2022 at 10:58am

Beautiful daughter!

Dawn - June 30th, 2022 at 11:09am

The song you wrote as a teen..my hope is in you..kept going through my head as I read this.

Mary Ganske - June 30th, 2022 at 3:54pm

Beautiful, Tori.

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